There’s a building on campus called the MARB. At a place where SWKT stands for Spencer W Kimball Tower and JFSB stands for Joseph F Smith Building one would assume that MARB stands for Michael A Richards Building, M Albert Rothberg Building or something like that. It doesn’t. It stands for Thomas L. Martin Building. But that’s beside the point.

I was leaving the MARB today after confirming that one of my classes was canceled and got stuck at the double-doors. It happens to good people every now and then. You try to be nice and hold the door open for someone else and you end up holding the door open for the entire student body. You can’t just let the door go unexpectedly, so you’re waiting for one of two things.

The first would be a gap in the crowd. Even a small gap gives a nice person room enough to let go of the door without feeling like he’s surprising the next student that comes along.

The second would be a casual arm extension. With careful timing you can transfer the weight of the opened door onto the arm of the person who offers support. Many times this person is simply making a gesture of thanks, but it provides the opportunity for escape.

I had about 2 hours to kill and there looked to be no rescue in sight, so I changed my outlook and took delight in holding the door open for so many hurried individuals.

Soon after there was a shift in human behavior. As I mentioned, these were double-doors, and rather than walk through the door I had opened, a few students made the effort to open the second door entirely and walk through it. I stood there, stunned, for a while, but as more and more people migrated to the other half of the doorway I decided to abandon my post.

I’d like to say that someone was nearly hit in the face as I let the door close. That would be poetic. But instead I simply walked away from the illogically named MARB wondering why people do what they do.

Then I found someone on eBay selling a complete selection of licensed NES games and accessories – currently going for $15,500.

Will wonders never cease?

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